You probably have never realized how much you have accumulated in your marriage until it comes time to divide it. From houses to cars to retirement accounts and dish sets, there is a never-ending amount of stuff to divide once your divorce has been set in motion. How do you go about dividing your property fairly?

First, identify the big things, such as any savings or significant retirement accounts, houses and cars or other items that have great monetary value. Make a list and set these items aside for your lawyer to discuss with you. Think about each one of these items, and ask yourself which are the most important to you. Maybe you would like to retain the family home, or you would like to keep your own retirement account. Make note of your feelings on each of these items and have it ready when you present the list to your lawyer. Keep in mind that it is unlikely you will get everything you want, so be ready to compromise.

Second, if at all possible, take an inventory of the personal things which are important to you, but small and not of significant monetary value. In keeping these things, such as dishes or pots and pans, etc, would you be willing to pay half their worth to help your spouse obtain similar items? This approach will be far cheaper than paying your lawyer to win you frivilous items. Is there another kind of compromise you could make, for example he keeps the power tools and you keep your kitchen items? You might find that these compromises are not hard to make
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In fairness, no matter how much you love your great mother in law’s credenza, if it is from his family he should have first say on who gets to keep it, and likewise for you. This holds true unless the family item is of a significant monetary value and given to both of you. Dividing it’s worth in this case is open to negotiate. Again, compromise can often be worked out if one approaches the other with a reasonable plan.

Avoid making sweeping statements to your spouse, such as ‘you can keep the furniture’ or other undefined statements. Furniture can be expensive, and since you will be planning to set up a new place of your own, or needing to refurnish your home, it is fair for you to consider these costs and ask for part of their value. While it can be time consuming and frustrating to put a monetary value which you both agree upon onto your belongings, in the end it might be more equitable for both of you. Keep in mind that what is fair is what is fair for both of you, and you will be able to divide your marital assets equitably.